I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
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