Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Randomize
