I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
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