You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Randomize
