You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
