Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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