What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
