I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Randomize
