They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
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