It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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