# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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