forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
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