I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I have feelings that need drinking.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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