I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I think people are normalizing furries
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
