I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
