I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Randomize
