Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
