Where did you get a picture of my penis
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Randomize
