Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
