Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
he wants to bone in the snuggie
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Randomize
