And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize