His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
