Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
