He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize
