no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
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