Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Floor bacon is actually really good
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
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