I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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