Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
