My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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