So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
