Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Are we still banned from the library?
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Randomize
