party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
