What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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