Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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