I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
