A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
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