After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
It's rum buckets o'clock
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
