Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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