Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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