I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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