was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
