Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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