You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Congratulations! We have a period
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
