What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
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