Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Randomize
