but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Randomize
