I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
