Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
