so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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