what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
