who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
